life began when i saw your face

"ask me how do i feel from this chemistry lesson we're learning
well sir all i can say is if i were a bridge i'd be burning"
-amel larrieux

I think that romance is something easily forgotten in everything except the opposite sex. I am an intensely romantic person. In thought, in design, in action, in love. Maybe that's why I lose attraction once I get it; the other person just doesn't have room in their life for more romance. Why are we so starved for it? I don't need love letters or people standing under my window and singing to me (though I've had both and they were wonderful), but what happened to our ability to give ourselves entirely to another paying no mind to any darkness that could become of it? I am hell-bent on relying on practicality in every area of my life...but love. And it seems like so many people here have done the opposite and now I'm in a place I don't think I deserve to be in. I don't REALLY think anyone deserves to be here, but an increasingly scary amount of people I know are. They're all right here, standing on the same little patch of grass looking over the fence...

I was in the store today buying gingerale for my sad belly and a lady walked by me singing along to the Sade song that was playing and she had such a pretty voice that it made me sing too. I wonder why I'm such a little bitch when it comes to something I know I'm good at. I should be able to sing at the top of my lungs whenever I want. Truthfully I think it'd make me feel a lot healthier.

I have a sex playlist. Not to say that when the magic happens I am like "HOLD ON" and run over to my computer to press play. But you know how certain songs just have that slow burn to them that makes you think of certain nights that you've had? I won't give away the whole list but here are a solid top ten. And I'll even give you an mp3.

10. Thirteen Days - JJ Cale
9. Since I've Been Lovin You - Led Zeppelin
8. Like a Tattoo - Sade
7. Your Eyes - Amel Larrieux
6. Middle Man - Dive Index
5. Pale Sun - Cowboy Junkies
4. Drown in My Own Tears - Ray Charles (I don't pay much attention to lyrics, just sound. Ignore the sadness haha)
3. Let You Down - Dave Matthews Band
2. We Haven't Turned Around - Gomez
1. MP3 [Best Dress - Damien Jurado]

No Barry White. It's just not my thaaang.

I want to learn how to play the harmonica

There are days when this sprawling, busy city seems so small to me and I can breathe easier and enjoy the feeling of the sun on my back when I step outside for a minute. You have days when you feel like you should be able to take the ride home from work slower and enjoy the breeze brushing past your skin, no? I certainly have those days (today’s one of em, what a wonderful feeling!), and I hope you do too.

Seeing Amel Larrieux on Sunset last night was- dare I say- the best concert experience I have ever had in its own intimate little way. The atmosphere was relaxed and focused, the Catalina jazz club is small and absolutely perfect for getting up close and personal to good music, the company I kept was warm. Amel is just flawless. She could walk into a room filled with colorful, interesting people and still capture everyone’s attention without any effort whatsoever. This whole weekend was filled with new things, good people, and crazy dancing. Crazy dancing from Amel's fans, crazy dancing from weird people at a Hollywood club opening, crazy dancing by men in red shirts at the Abbot Kinney Festival, and crazy dancing by John at the bar/at the festival/on Zoe's desk...). For ONCE the dancing was not supplied by yours truly! I don't know what came over me. I'll try harder next weekend. =)

It occurred to me that it’s been almost a month since I’ve thrown my arms around Momma and Papa Scott (and my best friend, but I think waiting 10 days for her to come here is do-able!) so I slipped out of the office for a second today to give my mom a call. There is no better feeling than knowing you have people to call that will always sound excited to hear your voice on the other end of the telephone.

I gotta tell ya, for growing up convinced that neither California nor the beach would be able to impress me, I laid in the grass last week and saw the most beautiful sunset over Venice that I’ve seen in a long time. What if the things that we see don’t look the same to anyone but ourselves? My lovely 7:30pm sun on the water might look like something completely different to someone else, but as long as they think it’s beautiful too, we’re all lucky.

I’m giving my late-September friendly blue Venice sky to YOU
H to-the-A to-the-double-N to-the-A

MP3: [Delta Spirit - People, Turn Around]
MP3: [Amel Larrieux - Weary]

PS--it rained in LA today!